Thursday evening one of my girlfriends texted me, “Hey what are you up to this weekend? Do you want to go to on a road trip?”
Less than 24 hours later, I left my job and staff -mid-shift- to embark on an 18-hour drive. With only a backpack in tow, and bikini bottoms in lieu of underwear, we got in her car and heading South towards Nashville.
When we finally arrived to the City of Music, we were greeted by handful of her friends who were also staying in town. That evening we spent hours bar hopping with the group, before eventually breaking away from the pack. We found our way across the street at a three-story live-music bar called, Honky Tonk. The bar boasted large balconies overlooking the famous Nashville strip. It was on this balcony, where we met James and Steven; when they nonchalantly decided to photobomb our selfie overlooking the neon lights of Broadway. Both from LA, James and Steven were also visiting the Nashville with a small group of friends for the weekend. The four of us spent the night hopping from bar to bar listening to live music, sipping Jack and Cokes and enjoying each other’s company. The night ended on the 37th floor of The Westin, with a new friend and a spectacular 360- view of the city.
Although there was great conversation with the LA boys, that is not what prompted me to write a blog entry. As I sit on my flight back to Boston, I can’t help but be grateful for my experience this weekend. To be in Nashville; meet new people, see new places, make new memories. It was honestly perfect.
When I initially found myself newly single; nearly two years ago, I was plagued by anxiety. Everything bothered me. Watching TV, alone. Going places on the weekends, alone. Holidays, alone. Sleeping every night, alone. With time, I learned to be content with my life, alone. This weekend with the Nashville girls, I heard stories of cheating boyfriends, failed relationships and wasted years with the ‘wrong one’. Listening to other people’s relationship experiences brought back memories of my own. Years I spent in a relationship with someone who was toxic. Someone who had such low self-esteem he projected his own deficiencies onto me in the form of jealous and control.
Where would my life be today if I were still with him? Would I be in Nashville? Definitely not. I wasn’t allowed to have my own identity with him. I was in a relationship where I morphed into the person I was with. After hearing similar relationship stories this weekend, it seems I’m not the only one. Why are we so quick to sacrifice our own happiness for the people we are with? I love to travel. I love to pick up and go; no notice, no planning, no bullshit. Sometimes the best adventures are the ones you never saw coming. I appreciated this weekend on such a deep level. For me, it was much more than just a trip away, it was recognition of not only being content as a single woman, but to look at the past and recognize that I am actually grateful for the single life I have.